Planning your wedding will be one of the best and most enjoyable experiences of your life, but equally, it will be one of the busiest and most stressful times too… (speaking from experience, on both accounts). This is why it is more than OK to ask for a little help from your friends and family when it comes to planning, making, creating, gluing, sticking and baking for your big day! Whether you are having a DIY wedding or not.
Delegating is certainly something that I don’t find all that easy (I’m a bit of a control freak, naturally, being a planner!), but it’s a skill any clever bride will learn to take on quickly if they are going to lighten the load and ease the pressure on the lead up to their wedding. And it’s one I strongly urge you to do, no matter how much of a control freak you are too! And no matter how much of a DIY wedding you plan to have!
Here’s a few top tips about how you can get all hands on deck without compromising your wedding or its aesthetics…
The BIG Set Up
Whether you are holding a church, barn or town hall celebration, there will be a ton of prep and set-up activities that need to be done a day or two before the wedding. You will need some man (and woman) power for this, as in, people to lift, carry, and move objects, boxes and props into their right places and positions. You will need transportation of items to and from the venue (any friends with a big boot or van would be a bonus!) and you will also need helpers to dress the ceremony and reception spaces.
Even if you have some help from someone like me, or your venue team, you will still need to actually get all your bits and bobs to your location – and you’ll be surprised at how much you accumulate! Transporting your table plan alone can be fragile and cumbersome work… so get help! Even just assigning your confetti transportation and safe delivery to a bridesmaid will be one less thing to worry about.
Artistic Hands – The More the Merrier!
If you are planning on incorporating ‘DIY’ elements into your wedding, then there are certain areas that you could consider asking your friends for help:
I made my own invites, as in, I designed them, sourced the materials, printed them, cut them up at home and prepared them for send-out completely solo… and it took me HOURS! If I could turn back time, I would’ve organised a ‘stationery’ night and handed over the guillotine and folding to my trusty mates. Asking for help would have saved me SO much time, and probably would’ve pumped a little fun into what eventually became a pretty boring and laborious job. And I didn’t even think of this as DIY wedding stationery tbh, since I got them printed online.
Place Cards, Table Plan, and Signage
If you are planning on handwriting and self-designing any of the above, grab yourself some help. Choose a friend or family member that you know will embrace these tasks, and even come up with new and exciting ways to make and present things. Rustic, outdoor weddings work so well with home-made signage and ‘festival-style’ stationery. While city weddings can be wonderfully complimented with some lovely calligraphy. You just need the to enlist a friend with nice handwriting to help pull them off for you!
Making and Baking
Some couples love to make edibles for their wedding, namely the cake and wedding favours. This is where you are SUPER lucky if you have a baker in the family! Not only will a homemade cake save you money (cake makers can charge anything from £200 – £2,000 for wedding cakes, depending on the creation, the number of tiers, and how many guests they are to feed), but it will also add such a lush, personal and scrumptious touch to your day. It’s lovely for a family member to feel so involved and have their creation on display, too.
Announcements and MC’ing
Do you have a friend or family member that you know can speak to a crowd? Someone with a confident and naturally loud voice? If yes, then this is the person that you want to MC on the day! The role of MC is to announce key events and timings to your guests throughout the day, so you want to choose someone that has a cheerful tone and a nice smile. You won’t have the capacity (or desire) to do this yourself, so get someone trustworthy on board. Some couples also hire a toastmaster, but a friend can easily do this as long as they know the right cues! (I also offer this as part of my Wedding Day Management package too though.)
Last but not least… Take Down
It’s all very well having a fantastic team to make, bake and set-up… but what about when it’s all over?! You will be amazed how much there is to do post-wedding. Who will take down all of the decorations? If you’re holding a dry hire wedding, who will sweep, mop, remove rubbish and generally ensure the venue is spotless before you all leave? Be prepared, have a team in place and make sure you treat them for their efforts. Many hands make light work, as they say – and I know this to be true.
When NOT to get help from your friends!
As wonderful as it is to ask your mates for help, there are certain wedding ‘tasks’ that you shouldn’t burden your nearest and dearest with. Some things should simply be left to the talent and skill of a professional! And these are:
Photography and Videography
Your photos last a lifetime, so it’s best to leave it to the professionals for this one. Also, if you’ve asked a friend or family member to capture your wedding, chances are they will at some point get distracted (and possibly drunk!) which will result in them missing those key moments.
Running the Bar
There are certain points of the day where a professional bar team will ensure your guests have drinks; drinks on arrival, speeches, toasts, that kind of thing. Only a team of people that have run countless wedding and events will appreciate the importance of these ‘thirst quenching’ moments! You also need a strong team to polish glasses, clear glasses, and wash up to successfully serve your guests from day through to night. This is definitely not something you want to DIY for your wedding, tust me.
On the Day Coordination
It is absolutely PIVITOL that you DON’T ask friends or family to do coordinate or host your wedding day. You need someone fully capable, organised and mega professional with a heap of wedding experience to be able to run your wedding the way it deserves to be run (hi! 🙋🏼). Suppliers need instructions, venues need administering and timings need to be kept to ensure everything goes off without a hitch. And you need someone that will still be headstrong and sober by the end of the day! A professional is the only way to go with this one. (Most hosted venues offer this service in house, but if they don’t, or if you are having a dry hire wedding, check out my services here.
And there you have it! I hope this helps and gives you the confidence to get people on board in the lead up to your wedding. It’s amazing what true friends and caring family will do for you, and if anything, they will most likely feel totally honoured to be a bigger part of your day than just a guest. Even if it means giving up a chunk of their precious evening or Sunday afternoon to help you out, they will be more happy to help than you think!
Also don’t be afraid to enlist bridesmaids and groomsmen, that’s what they are for! Even if you’re not having a DIY wedding, their help will be invaluable.
Please email any hellos or enquiries to email@example.com